Eunhyuk sat on the window seat, staring at the rain pouring down like a million falling stars. It was dark and gray, but he still liked it. The rain pattered on the tin cans; Eunhyuk loved the sound of rain. Eunhyuk had always thought that the rain symbolized the skies crying, the same thing he was doing now. He stared at the rain falling, the water droplets dripping down on the window as if they were competing for a race. Eunhyuk traced his hand on the foggy window and spelled out, "D-O-N-G-H-A-E". A name that tasted so sweet, so graceful. A name that held many memories, memories that would only remain as memories and nothing more. Eunhyuk put his hand down and felt a lump in his throat. The tears wouldn't stop flowing, there were just too much. However, Eunhyuk felt comforted; he wasn't the only one crying, the sky was crying too.
His face etched with sorrow and with a despairing look, Eunhyuk woke up in the morning, tired of sleeping. His life was a shade of gray now, nothing else. The liveliness and vibrant colors of his life was gone. His heart aching with nostalgia, he staggered into the shower to wash up. Washing his dried tears away every morning was now a daily routine. Getting out of the shower, he made his bed alone, occasionally stroking the other side of the bed gently. Eunhyuk missed his other half, the one that would sleep beside him and cuddle him in the middle of the night. He missed Donghae's scent, Donghae's strong arms wrapping around his waist as he slept, Donghae's whines. He missed everything about Donghae. But what he missed most was the most simplest gesture of all. Eunhyuk missed holding Donghae's hands.
Eunhyuk smiled to himself in the mirror, but soon wiped it off from his face. He looked horrible smiling.
"You have such a fake smile." He talked to himself to the mirror.
"Another day of pure torture." He whispered inaudibly to the mirror again before walking out of his house and locking it up. With his body slumped, he leaned on his door and sighed. It was going to be a new day. A new day without Donghae.
Eunhyuk walked steady on his feet afterwards, talking casually to his neighbors. He was glad, glad that his voice had obeyed him.
He decided to take the bus to work today, wanting to delay his time as much as possible. Going to work meant seeing Donghae, and he couldn't do that just yet. He needed to prepare himself. Eunhyuk needed to calm himself down. Eunhyuk had to remain calm as he watched the love of his life give him a cheerful smile as if everything that happened between them had never happened.
After skipping at least three buses and walking at the most slowest pace possible, Eunhyuk decided that he was ready to go to work. He pulled the door to SM Entertainment's building and entered, smiling to the girl who worked at the front table. Putting his hands in pockets, he walked even slowly to where he was supposed to meet the other Super Junior members for the discussion of their sixth album. On the way, he peered into a few practice rooms, completely surprising his juniors and seniors respectively. He chatted cheerfully with them for a while, even though he knew that he was already late and that the other members would probably slit his throat for being so late.
"What are you doing here? The rest are already waiting for you, Eunhyuk." Sungmin suddenly appeared behind him while he was talking to Sehun, a member of EXO-K, EXO's subgroup.
Eunhyuk jumped a little and smiled sheepishly, waving goodbye to Sehun. As soon as they walked away from Sehun and walked nearer towards their destination, Sungmin gave a pat on Eunhyuk's shoulder.
"Stay strong." Sungmin smiled warmly before opening the door to the practice room. Eunhyuk nodded slowly, appreciating Sungmin's thoughtfulness.
"Well look who's finally here!" Kangin sneered, earning a hit on the head from Leeteuk. Leeteuk flashed a quick disapproving glare to Kangin, but Eunhyuk saw it all. Eunhyuk could see the pity on each and every one of the member's face, and he didn't like it. It felt purely awkward.
Suddenly, a buff figure appeared beside him and ruffled his hair. "You're here, I was beginning to think you wouldn't make it." The said person whispered.
Donghae.
The memories came running back into Eunhyuk's mind - their memories. Eunhyuk felt the tears coming. His heart was beating growing faster by the second and his palms started sweating. Eunhyuk thought he'd be alright, but he was wrong. He lowered his head and stared at Donghae's hands before staring at the ground.
"Sorry for being so late guys." Eunhyuk said, his voice with a lifeless monotone.
There was an awkward silence before Leeteuk broke it. "It's fine. Let's just start the discussion shall we?"
They all agreed and sat in a huge circle, facing each other. Unluckily enough, Eunhyuk caught himself sitting right across Donghae.
Donghae smiled at him, but he couldn't find it in him to return the smile. His heart ached so badly, as if it was breaking into a million shattered pieces. The memories were too much. There were too many memories of Donghae.
As they started the discussion, Eunhyuk zoned out and let his mind wander off to his memories. In the past, Donghae would always steal kisses from him in between practices. In the past, whenever Donghae had the chance to, he'd grab Eunhyuk's hand and intertwine their fingers together. In the past, Donghae was always the first one to initiate their conversation. In the past, Donghae was the first one to say, "I love you". However, that was in the past. The past was over, yet Eunhyuk missed it. A wave of nostalgia took him over. He missed the past. If he were in the past right now, Donghae would have been giving him playful winks as they sat across each other. But as he looked at Donghae now, Donghae was not paying any attention to him. Not even one glance was spared.
Eunhyuk didn't know how their spark ended. They had always been friends, until it developed into something further. Eunhyuk didn't understand why Donghae left. They were perfect for each other, at least in Eunhyuk's eyes. All he could remember now was Donghae caressing his face and telling him softly that they weren't made for each other.
'This has to end now." Donghae had told him. Eunhyuk didn't understand. He'd never understand.
After hours and hours of spending his day with the members, his long day finally came to an end. He began regretting not driving to work, because apparently, Donghae was going to take the same bus as him too. They sat beside each other in the bus, talking occasionally. Eunhyuk appreciated the fact that Donghae was trying to keep their friendship going, but Eunhyuk just couldn't play along in Donghae's little act. He didn't understand how Donghae could act so normally, when they had so many memories of each other. Their relationship went very far, so how could he act like that? Eventually, Eunhyuk got sick of Donghae's acts and alighted at a stop quite far away from his own. Donghae knew that it wasn't Eunhyuk's time to alight, but he let him go anyway, no questions asked. He could already see the reasons from Eunhyuk's dejected face. As Eunhyuk alighted and stood at the bus-stop, Donghae looked out of the window and stared. Eunhyuk stared back, watching as the bus drove forward, taking Donghae away from him.
Upon reaching home, Eunhyuk sat down on the chair of his dining table and lifted his hands. He stared at them and imagined Donghae's hand intertwined with his. He knew it'd take a long time for him to be able to move on because, his hands don't want to start again. His hands don't understand. His hands didn't want to be without Donghae's hands. His hands missed holding his baby.
His hands couldn't let Donghae go.
His face etched with sorrow and with a despairing look, Eunhyuk woke up in the morning, tired of sleeping. His life was a shade of gray now, nothing else. The liveliness and vibrant colors of his life was gone. His heart aching with nostalgia, he staggered into the shower to wash up. Washing his dried tears away every morning was now a daily routine. Getting out of the shower, he made his bed alone, occasionally stroking the other side of the bed gently. Eunhyuk missed his other half, the one that would sleep beside him and cuddle him in the middle of the night. He missed Donghae's scent, Donghae's strong arms wrapping around his waist as he slept, Donghae's whines. He missed everything about Donghae. But what he missed most was the most simplest gesture of all. Eunhyuk missed holding Donghae's hands.
Eunhyuk smiled to himself in the mirror, but soon wiped it off from his face. He looked horrible smiling.
"You have such a fake smile." He talked to himself to the mirror.
"Another day of pure torture." He whispered inaudibly to the mirror again before walking out of his house and locking it up. With his body slumped, he leaned on his door and sighed. It was going to be a new day. A new day without Donghae.
Eunhyuk walked steady on his feet afterwards, talking casually to his neighbors. He was glad, glad that his voice had obeyed him.
He decided to take the bus to work today, wanting to delay his time as much as possible. Going to work meant seeing Donghae, and he couldn't do that just yet. He needed to prepare himself. Eunhyuk needed to calm himself down. Eunhyuk had to remain calm as he watched the love of his life give him a cheerful smile as if everything that happened between them had never happened.
After skipping at least three buses and walking at the most slowest pace possible, Eunhyuk decided that he was ready to go to work. He pulled the door to SM Entertainment's building and entered, smiling to the girl who worked at the front table. Putting his hands in pockets, he walked even slowly to where he was supposed to meet the other Super Junior members for the discussion of their sixth album. On the way, he peered into a few practice rooms, completely surprising his juniors and seniors respectively. He chatted cheerfully with them for a while, even though he knew that he was already late and that the other members would probably slit his throat for being so late.
"What are you doing here? The rest are already waiting for you, Eunhyuk." Sungmin suddenly appeared behind him while he was talking to Sehun, a member of EXO-K, EXO's subgroup.
Eunhyuk jumped a little and smiled sheepishly, waving goodbye to Sehun. As soon as they walked away from Sehun and walked nearer towards their destination, Sungmin gave a pat on Eunhyuk's shoulder.
"Stay strong." Sungmin smiled warmly before opening the door to the practice room. Eunhyuk nodded slowly, appreciating Sungmin's thoughtfulness.
"Well look who's finally here!" Kangin sneered, earning a hit on the head from Leeteuk. Leeteuk flashed a quick disapproving glare to Kangin, but Eunhyuk saw it all. Eunhyuk could see the pity on each and every one of the member's face, and he didn't like it. It felt purely awkward.
Suddenly, a buff figure appeared beside him and ruffled his hair. "You're here, I was beginning to think you wouldn't make it." The said person whispered.
Donghae.
The memories came running back into Eunhyuk's mind - their memories. Eunhyuk felt the tears coming. His heart was beating growing faster by the second and his palms started sweating. Eunhyuk thought he'd be alright, but he was wrong. He lowered his head and stared at Donghae's hands before staring at the ground.
"Sorry for being so late guys." Eunhyuk said, his voice with a lifeless monotone.
There was an awkward silence before Leeteuk broke it. "It's fine. Let's just start the discussion shall we?"
They all agreed and sat in a huge circle, facing each other. Unluckily enough, Eunhyuk caught himself sitting right across Donghae.
Donghae smiled at him, but he couldn't find it in him to return the smile. His heart ached so badly, as if it was breaking into a million shattered pieces. The memories were too much. There were too many memories of Donghae.
As they started the discussion, Eunhyuk zoned out and let his mind wander off to his memories. In the past, Donghae would always steal kisses from him in between practices. In the past, whenever Donghae had the chance to, he'd grab Eunhyuk's hand and intertwine their fingers together. In the past, Donghae was always the first one to initiate their conversation. In the past, Donghae was the first one to say, "I love you". However, that was in the past. The past was over, yet Eunhyuk missed it. A wave of nostalgia took him over. He missed the past. If he were in the past right now, Donghae would have been giving him playful winks as they sat across each other. But as he looked at Donghae now, Donghae was not paying any attention to him. Not even one glance was spared.
Eunhyuk didn't know how their spark ended. They had always been friends, until it developed into something further. Eunhyuk didn't understand why Donghae left. They were perfect for each other, at least in Eunhyuk's eyes. All he could remember now was Donghae caressing his face and telling him softly that they weren't made for each other.
'This has to end now." Donghae had told him. Eunhyuk didn't understand. He'd never understand.
After hours and hours of spending his day with the members, his long day finally came to an end. He began regretting not driving to work, because apparently, Donghae was going to take the same bus as him too. They sat beside each other in the bus, talking occasionally. Eunhyuk appreciated the fact that Donghae was trying to keep their friendship going, but Eunhyuk just couldn't play along in Donghae's little act. He didn't understand how Donghae could act so normally, when they had so many memories of each other. Their relationship went very far, so how could he act like that? Eventually, Eunhyuk got sick of Donghae's acts and alighted at a stop quite far away from his own. Donghae knew that it wasn't Eunhyuk's time to alight, but he let him go anyway, no questions asked. He could already see the reasons from Eunhyuk's dejected face. As Eunhyuk alighted and stood at the bus-stop, Donghae looked out of the window and stared. Eunhyuk stared back, watching as the bus drove forward, taking Donghae away from him.
Upon reaching home, Eunhyuk sat down on the chair of his dining table and lifted his hands. He stared at them and imagined Donghae's hand intertwined with his. He knew it'd take a long time for him to be able to move on because, his hands don't want to start again. His hands don't understand. His hands didn't want to be without Donghae's hands. His hands missed holding his baby.
His hands couldn't let Donghae go.
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